Totally Legit Internet History: Thriller Thursday

On October 31st, 2013 Steven Satin fell asleep as normal, and for unknown reasons slipped into a coma. Over three months later, on February 15th, 2014, the forty-four year old married father of three woke up. Again for no known reason. He was, inexplicably, in perfect health and the only issue he seemed to have was a persistent dream he had experienced while in the coma.

For the next eighteen months he posted this dreams as a weekly serial story under the hashtag Thriller Thursday. Readers were captivated by the tale of Eddie, a serial killer who had been burned alive by a town for no apparent reason and sought revenge on the teenage children of his murderers. In gruesome detail, he outlined how Eddie terrorized his victims, stalking and killing them in their dreams. How Eddie survived multiple mortal injuries.

A fervor was created thanks to Satin’s lurid story telling, and movie studios were chomping at the bit to license his work. Until September 2015, when weeks after legendary horror icon Wes Craven’s death someone pointed out that these tales bore a striking similarity to Craven’s.

Now the most hated man in the horror community, Craven’s hardcore fans hunted Satin down. Eventually cornering him in a boiler room where he admitted he was never actually in a coma. He actually just decided he wanted to get out of all the obligations that went along with the holiday season. The reason he “woke up” after Valentine’s Day was because he had seduced several nurses in the hospital into helping him and each had almost discovered that each had pressured him on the notoriously romantic holiday to leave his wife and be with him full time.

The crowd, knowing how pathetic he was, left in disgust and were shocked when the building exploded shortly after the vacated. Several good Samaritans rushed back and found the nurses and Satin’s wife outside the building. When asked what happened, they all looked at each other and shrugged.

No further investigation into the death was conducted.

Really, the characters were totally different. Eddie's claw was on his left hand, he wore a red and blue stripped sweater, and wore a bowler hat. See? Not even close to the same character.
Really, the characters were totally different. Eddie’s claw was on his left hand, he wore a red and blue stripped sweater, and wore a bowler hat. See? Not even close to the same character.
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